Posts Tagged ‘Produce’

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October 21, 2008

So I was thinking today, why don’t more people spend their time drinking apple juice? It’s delicious, it’s nutrcious, it’s high in sugar. It’s like nature’s motor oil, only if people regularly drank motor oil and it tasted like apple juice.

Visual aid:

Apple juice

Apple juice (from concentrate)

Motor Oil:

Motor oil

Motor oil (tasty/delicious)

As our visual evidence shows, motor oil is at least greater than or equal to apple juice in taste, quality and nutritional content.

In conclusion, Nader ’08!

Sexy produce

October 16, 2008

8 Most Attractive Fruits and Vegetables:


1) Butternut squash – Magnificent curves.

Butternut squash

Butternut squash

2) Pears – Baby got back.

Pear

Pear

3) Strawberries – Plump, delectable, juicy — they’re like the boobs of produce. No wonder they’re top-heavy.

Strawberry

Strawberry

4) Asparagus – For those who like ’em skinny. And check out that crazy hair!

Asparagus

Asparagus

5) Bananas – I think you know why…

Banana

Banana

6) Jalapenos – Now that shit is HOT. Seriously, they’re really spicy. And I hear they get around, so be sure to use protection.

Jalapenos

Jalapenos

7) Oranges – What, am I the only one who finds oranges attractive? Come on, like you’ve never thought about an orange that way.

Oranges

Oranges

8 ) Watermelon – 50% melon, 50% water, 100% sexy. Plus: seedless.

Watermelon

Watermelon

Yeah, that’s the stuff.